Glasgow Granny Grapples with Amorous Lycanthrope

Glasgow Werewolf Admirer

In an unusual twist of events, a 65-year-old Glasgow woman has reportedly filed a complaint with the local police, claiming that a werewolf has fallen head over paws in love with her. The senior, known only as Mrs. Agnes, alleges that the smitten creature has been howling serenades under her window during the full moon, leaving paw-printed love notes, and sending her bouquets of freshly picked forest flora.

The authorities were initially skeptical of the report, but after several nights of disturbances, they decided to investigate. Neighbors corroborate Mrs. Agnes’s account, with one stating, “I thought it was just the neighborhood dogs acting up, but then I saw this big, furry figure running away with a rose in its mouth!”

Police are now on the lookout for the lovelorn lycanthrope, advising residents to keep their silverware handy just in case. Meanwhile, Mrs. Agnes is considering taking out a restraining order against the moonstruck monster. “I’m flattered, but I’m just not looking for a relationship right now,” she stated, “especially not with a werewolf. I’m more of a cat person.”

This bizarre tale has left the community buzzing with a mix of fear and fascination. Some locals are planning a neighborhood watch, while others are wondering if this could be the plot of the next big supernatural romance novel. As for Mrs. Agnes, she just hopes her furry admirer finds love elsewhere—preferably someone who shares his nocturnal lifestyle.