In an unprecedented turn of events, Switzerland, the land known for its high living standards and even higher mountains, has witnessed a peculiar phenomenon. Millions of Swiss citizens have reportedly signed a petition demanding a decrease in the average national salary. The petition, titled “Enough of Enough!”, has taken the country by storm, with people from all walks of life joining in the salary-slimming crusade.
The movement started in the small, picturesque town of Sankt Minimalist, where local banker Hans Gruber declared he had too much money to enjoy life. “I tried to stuff my mattress with cash, but now I can’t close my bedroom door!” exclaimed Gruber. Inspired by his plight, citizens across the nation have rallied to the cause, seeking to embrace a more ‘modest’ lifestyle.
Economists are baffled, politicians are perplexed, and luxury watchmakers are winding down production in anticipation of this new frugal trend. “We’re designing a new watch with no hands – to symbolize the time we’ve saved not counting money,” said a leading watchmaker, who wishes to remain anonymous.
The Swiss Cheese Consortium has reported a sharp increase in holes, attributing it to the country’s newfound love for ‘less’. Meanwhile, the Swiss Chocolate Council has begun producing hollow chocolates, marketing them as “the sweet taste of nothingness.”
As the world watches this curious development, one thing is clear: the Swiss are cutting more than just cheese. They’re slicing through societal norms, one franc at a time. Whether this will lead to a new era of minimalism or just a collective desire to fit into smaller bank vaults remains to be seen.