In a move that has left the world both baffled and amused, the UK government has unveiled its latest strategy to combat climate change. Prime Minister Rishi Sunak, in a press conference held under a giant umbrella to symbolize protection from the sun, announced that all buildings in the UK will now be required to wear sunscreen.
“Yes, you heard that right,” Sunak chuckled, “We’re applying SPF 50 to every brick and mortar in the country. It’s not just for humans anymore; our buildings need protection too!”
But the surprises didn’t end there. In a bid to harness every possible source of renewable energy, the government has mandated that all pets must wear miniature wind turbines. “Think of it as a stylish new collar accessory,” Environment Secretary Therese Coffey quipped, “and it’s eco-friendly!”
Critics argue these measures might be more about distraction than actual environmental impact. “Is this really about saving the planet, or just saving face?” asked a skeptical environmentalist, who preferred to remain anonymous, possibly to avoid being fitted with a wind turbine hat.
The new policy, set to begin next spring, has already sparked a wave of memes and satirical merchandise, including “Sunblock for My House” t-shirts and “Pet Turbine” toy lines. Whether these measures will cool the planet or just the political climate remains to be seen.