In a move that has sent shockwaves through fairgrounds and dentists’ offices alike, the British government has announced a ban on the sale of cotton candy to children under 12. The decision, part of a broader initiative to combat childhood obesity, has been met with a mix of approval and outrage across the nation.
Health Minister Wes Streeting defended the policy, stating, “We must protect our youth from the dangers of spun sugar. It’s a matter of national security… for our children’s teeth.” The ban will take effect next month, just in time for the summer fair season.
Cotton candy vendors are up in arms, with the National Association of Floss Purveyors (NAFP) calling the measure “a sticky situation for small businesses.” Some have already begun developing “underground candy floss speakeasies” in response.
Parents’ reactions have been mixed. Sarah Thompson, mother of three, sighed, “Great, now I’ll have to smuggle candy floss in my handbag like it’s contraband.” Meanwhile, dentists across the UK are celebrating, with one gleefully exclaiming, “Finally, a policy with some bite!”
Enterprising teens have started a black market for the sugary treat, with reports of “candy floss mules” operating in schoolyards. The going rate? A hefty five quid per stick.
As the nation grapples with this sweet controversy, one thing is certain: the cotton candy industry in Britain is about to experience a sugar crash of epic proportions.