G20 Caps Use of ‘Unprecedented’ in Official Statements

G20 limits 'unprecedented' usage

In a move that has left diplomats scrambling for synonyms, the G20 has implemented a strict quota on the use of the word “unprecedented” in official statements. The decision came after a marathon session where leaders realized they had collectively used the term over 500 times in the past year alone.

The new policy allows each nation only three uses of “unprecedented” per calendar year, with violators facing penalties ranging from mandatory thesaurus training to being forced to listen to recordings of their own speeches on repeat.

“We’ve reached a point where everything is unprecedented,” sighed one anonymous G20 official. “It’s unprecedented how unprecedented things have become.”

Linguists worldwide are celebrating the decision, hailing it as a victory for lexical diversity. Meanwhile, speechwriters are in crisis mode, frantically searching for alternatives like “unparalleled,” “exceptional,” and “first of its kind.”

Some nations are already strategizing how to maximize their quota. Sources say the UK is saving all three uses for Brexit-related announcements, while Australia is reserving theirs exclusively for describing unusual weather phenomena.

Critics argue the move is shortsighted, pointing out that truly unprecedented events may go underreported. However, proponents believe it will encourage more precise language in global discourse.

As leaders adapt to this linguistic constraint, only time will tell if this unp… rather, extraordinary measure will have the desired effect on international communication.