Stand-Up Flying Takes Off

American Airlines standing passengers discount

American Airlines has unveiled a groundbreaking initiative aimed at budget-conscious travelers: discounted fares for passengers willing to fly standing up.

The new “VertiFly” program promises savings of up to 40% for those ready to embrace a more vertical flying experience. Company spokesperson Sarah Upright explained, “We’re literally elevating the concept of affordable travel.”

The airline plans to retrofit select aircraft with specially designed harnesses and lean-to supports. Passengers will be securely strapped in, allowing for a safe, if somewhat less relaxing, journey.

Critics have raised concerns about comfort and safety, but the FAA has provisionally approved the concept, stating, “As long as they don’t try to cram in more people than oxygen masks, we’re cautiously optimistic.”

Some frequent flyers are embracing the idea. Business traveler Mike Stander enthused, “I always work standing up anyway. This’ll save my company a fortune!”

However, not everyone is on board. Ergonomics expert Dr. Payne Backman warned, “Long-haul flights could become a real pain in the neck… and back, and legs.”

American Airlines reassures skeptics that complimentary compression socks will be provided, and flight attendants will lead hourly calf-raise exercises to prevent blood clots.

As the aviation industry watches closely, competitors are reportedly exploring their own unique seating alternatives, from hammocks to human stacking.